Here's what I did to give my confidence a little boost at the beginning of this journey!
Bad Times...Good Times...Better Times...
17 hours ago
Monday, March 19, 2012
Going Shopping To Lose Weight!
Here's what I did to give my confidence a little boost at the beginning of this journey!
Friday, March 16, 2012
Try A Sample...Don't Worry! It's Good For You! :)
Hi Friends! Did you know that over 40 of you checked my blog yesterday? Thank you!!! I am only now seeing the comments that so many of you posted after that firt weigh-in and it is strengthening me more than you can imagine. I guess some more posted after I had looked so I didn't realize there were more words of encouragement there. Your love and vocal support amazes me and is why I haven't quit yet. :)
I thought I would share some samples of some other good stuff you've shared with me...
First, I had a message recently from a college friend I haven't had contact with for over 6 years. Holland is the kind of guy you want as your friend, and what do you know? As soon as you meet him HE IS your friend because he is just that kind of person. He's kind, funny, accepting, spiritual, dependable, trustworthy, makes you laugh and just feel comfortable. What I remembered about him wasn't that he was overweight, but that he was an awesome, funny, good person and that he went through a transformation in college. You could see him running around the track, playing football and lacrosse. I didn't know what had changed, but he seemed even more happy than before, was soon engaged and then I moved and just lost contact.
Well, awesome Holland, after seeing my blog sent me something. Turns out my friend went on to study fitness, become a personal trainer and even write a book called The Fat Trainer. It's about "How An Overweight Personal Trainer Put It All Together To Get In Shape." It's great! I'm halfway through it and am really enjoying the tips to fitness he shares in a converational, relaxed but focused, even fun dialogue. He teaches the basics (and a little more) for effective weight-training, cardio work-outs, eating and general well-being. He HAS BEEN THERE and is open about his highest weight, his boredom with cardio and what he did to change it, and so much more. You can learn more about The Fat Trainer here, find it and Like it on Facebook or just buy it on Amazon for your kindle, ipad, bookshelf, whatever! for under $7. Holland, you are awesome! Thank You for sharing your experiences and knowledge!
Another blog (it's a whole lot more than that too) I was made aware of today that I have to share is Oh She Glows. That link will take you to her About page which has a provacative slide show with statistics and images focusing on the world's skewed view of health. I was overcome when I read the statistic regarding the number of 9 and 10 year-old girls who diet. My daughter is 6 and I am trying very hard to teach "healthy eating," and not how to starve yourself. This is important to me since close family members and even myself have struggled with eating disorders. Food is not the enemy! How we eat or don't eat, why we eat or don't eat and what we eat or don't eat is what we need to be thinking about.
She has awesome recipes that I am looking forward to using. After starting to read The End of Overeating (which I will HAVE to write about another day because it's amazing- check out the link for an article about it) I want to try harder to make crackers, breads, granola bars etc. myself so I'm not relying on the store's processed foods. I will hopefully post some tasty and healthy pictures of food this weekend. I hope these resources serve as more support for you like they are for me. Feel free to post a link or book title in a comment! I'd appreciate it! Thanks For Reading, Eva
I thought I would share some samples of some other good stuff you've shared with me...
First, I had a message recently from a college friend I haven't had contact with for over 6 years. Holland is the kind of guy you want as your friend, and what do you know? As soon as you meet him HE IS your friend because he is just that kind of person. He's kind, funny, accepting, spiritual, dependable, trustworthy, makes you laugh and just feel comfortable. What I remembered about him wasn't that he was overweight, but that he was an awesome, funny, good person and that he went through a transformation in college. You could see him running around the track, playing football and lacrosse. I didn't know what had changed, but he seemed even more happy than before, was soon engaged and then I moved and just lost contact.
Well, awesome Holland, after seeing my blog sent me something. Turns out my friend went on to study fitness, become a personal trainer and even write a book called The Fat Trainer. It's about "How An Overweight Personal Trainer Put It All Together To Get In Shape." It's great! I'm halfway through it and am really enjoying the tips to fitness he shares in a converational, relaxed but focused, even fun dialogue. He teaches the basics (and a little more) for effective weight-training, cardio work-outs, eating and general well-being. He HAS BEEN THERE and is open about his highest weight, his boredom with cardio and what he did to change it, and so much more. You can learn more about The Fat Trainer here, find it and Like it on Facebook or just buy it on Amazon for your kindle, ipad, bookshelf, whatever! for under $7. Holland, you are awesome! Thank You for sharing your experiences and knowledge!
Another blog (it's a whole lot more than that too) I was made aware of today that I have to share is Oh She Glows. That link will take you to her About page which has a provacative slide show with statistics and images focusing on the world's skewed view of health. I was overcome when I read the statistic regarding the number of 9 and 10 year-old girls who diet. My daughter is 6 and I am trying very hard to teach "healthy eating," and not how to starve yourself. This is important to me since close family members and even myself have struggled with eating disorders. Food is not the enemy! How we eat or don't eat, why we eat or don't eat and what we eat or don't eat is what we need to be thinking about.
She has awesome recipes that I am looking forward to using. After starting to read The End of Overeating (which I will HAVE to write about another day because it's amazing- check out the link for an article about it) I want to try harder to make crackers, breads, granola bars etc. myself so I'm not relying on the store's processed foods. I will hopefully post some tasty and healthy pictures of food this weekend. I hope these resources serve as more support for you like they are for me. Feel free to post a link or book title in a comment! I'd appreciate it! Thanks For Reading, Eva
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Why Get Are You Getting Fit NOW?! or The Whole Truth And Nothing But The Truth...
The phone calls, texts and emails so many people have sent me have been incredible. THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! I know this is still the "honeymoon phase" of this journey, but I am going to enjoy it as long as it lasts, and your comments and encouragement are For those of you who might be thinking aobut starting this journey, or are discouraged because you haven't had the "willpower" or whatever to do so yet, this post is for you! Here are my reasons for getting fit now, in no particular order...
MEDIA- Usually, weight-wise, this is a really negative thing. The media often says "Be skinny! skinny! skinny!" This has actually made me NOT want to lose weight just to show you can be heavier and still be happy and beautiful. BUT, I want to be healthy too. There are two shows I began watching on instant play on Netflix that really opened my eyes. The first show is called Ruby and follows an obese woman's struggle with weight-loss. Ruby is from the south, loves southern cooking and is just such a personality! It was fun to look forward to watching her progress or setbacks and seeing how she handled them (and of course, while watching a show like this, I had to get off the couch and walk or jog in place or lift my hand weights...)
She does everything from trying new workouts, to shopping, to driving for the first time, going camping for the first time, all of these things because she is finally losing the weight that has taken over her life. A turning point for me was a scene where she goes into a fantastic candy shop. Chocolates and all sorts of beautiful, yummy desserts are everywhere. Several employees offer her free samples! She points out her favorite treats from this store, but ulitmately leaves having bought and sampled NOTHING. I have tears in my eyes just thinking about it, thinking aobut the sacrifice that was. Surely one little bite after an entire life of binging couldn't make too much of a difference. But it would. She said that she couldn't cheat anymore and she would probably never go into that store again because it was like an alcoholic going into a bar. That made me realize that I couldn't keep surrounding myself with junk food and think I was going to change. I couldn't keep making excuses and "start eating healthier tomorrow..." because tomorrow would never come.
Am I addicted to food? Maybe not as much as some people, but there is part of me like most of the population that craves chocolate, or a good ice cream cone. Am I never going to have them again? No, but I want to be like Ruby in that I don't cheat. I am not going to eat these foods secretly, or because I'm depressed or because I'm mad at myself. It will be part of a healthy lifestyle, and will be on the rare occasion with my friends and family near me. If Ruby can do it, I can do it.
The other show that got me going was The Biggest Loser. On Season One there was one girl who weighed less than me on the show and one who weighed the same as me. THAT was an EYE-OPENER. The show was only supposed to be for big people who really needed to lose weight. What? That was me?! Regardless of their heights or compared BMI's, I was either in that group or close to it, so it was time I did something about it.
The other reason I will write about right now is... STABILITY.
We all have ups and downs in life. Our (my husband and mine) down has been our financial situation. No matter where he has worked or how much we have cut down our budget there has never been enough money. We don't own new cars, boats, timeshares, or even new clothes, but it's just always been extremely tight. We learned new meaning of the word frugal 3 years ago when the dream job my husband had just begun was over 9 months later. The didn't receive payment on several homes they had built and a 30 year-old company was bankrupt just like that. We were left with him trying to pick up the pieces, pay mounting bills and make the OLD historical home we had just moved into more livable.
When you end up on foodstamps, medicare and going to the foodpantry to feed your kids your mind isn't thinking a whole lot about how toned your arms are. When there are holes in the walls of your house, your annual paycheck is now a third of what you were getting and you have no idea when they will be patched up, it's hard to focus on losing 10 pounds, let alone 40! If anything the pounds increase because you can't relax on a vacation or even enjoy a daytrip to an amusement park, but you can enjoy a slice of cake. Well, we are finally living in a house now that is finished (we have moved and are renting,) that I can't do projects on even if I wanted to. My husband has a job where with a few hours of overtime we can pay all our bills- I am SO grateful to be paying my own utilities! I am grateful for the humility we had to laern the past few years- I've learned to accept help and that I can't do it all on my own. And I finally have a space in my brain where I can make my health a priority and take on the stress that is also a small part of this goal. My brain and heart were just too full of other worries to tackle my health too. My world feels more stable and safe than it has for years, so I am more able to add the changes that are part of getting fit.
Well, that was super long so I'm gonna call it, but if you're interested in seeing another person's weight-loss journey (and not at a beautiful ranch away from the real world) WATCH RUBY! :) BTW, just in case, I want to add that I am not a doctor and you should consult yours before beginning any diet or fitness regimen.
And most of all, if you are at a place in life right now where things are scary, unstable, and unsure, hang in there. It will get better. OK, have a healthy day! Love yourself and one good choice will lead to another! -Eva
MEDIA- Usually, weight-wise, this is a really negative thing. The media often says "Be skinny! skinny! skinny!" This has actually made me NOT want to lose weight just to show you can be heavier and still be happy and beautiful. BUT, I want to be healthy too. There are two shows I began watching on instant play on Netflix that really opened my eyes. The first show is called Ruby and follows an obese woman's struggle with weight-loss. Ruby is from the south, loves southern cooking and is just such a personality! It was fun to look forward to watching her progress or setbacks and seeing how she handled them (and of course, while watching a show like this, I had to get off the couch and walk or jog in place or lift my hand weights...)
She does everything from trying new workouts, to shopping, to driving for the first time, going camping for the first time, all of these things because she is finally losing the weight that has taken over her life. A turning point for me was a scene where she goes into a fantastic candy shop. Chocolates and all sorts of beautiful, yummy desserts are everywhere. Several employees offer her free samples! She points out her favorite treats from this store, but ulitmately leaves having bought and sampled NOTHING. I have tears in my eyes just thinking about it, thinking aobut the sacrifice that was. Surely one little bite after an entire life of binging couldn't make too much of a difference. But it would. She said that she couldn't cheat anymore and she would probably never go into that store again because it was like an alcoholic going into a bar. That made me realize that I couldn't keep surrounding myself with junk food and think I was going to change. I couldn't keep making excuses and "start eating healthier tomorrow..." because tomorrow would never come.
Am I addicted to food? Maybe not as much as some people, but there is part of me like most of the population that craves chocolate, or a good ice cream cone. Am I never going to have them again? No, but I want to be like Ruby in that I don't cheat. I am not going to eat these foods secretly, or because I'm depressed or because I'm mad at myself. It will be part of a healthy lifestyle, and will be on the rare occasion with my friends and family near me. If Ruby can do it, I can do it.
The other show that got me going was The Biggest Loser. On Season One there was one girl who weighed less than me on the show and one who weighed the same as me. THAT was an EYE-OPENER. The show was only supposed to be for big people who really needed to lose weight. What? That was me?! Regardless of their heights or compared BMI's, I was either in that group or close to it, so it was time I did something about it.
The other reason I will write about right now is... STABILITY.
We all have ups and downs in life. Our (my husband and mine) down has been our financial situation. No matter where he has worked or how much we have cut down our budget there has never been enough money. We don't own new cars, boats, timeshares, or even new clothes, but it's just always been extremely tight. We learned new meaning of the word frugal 3 years ago when the dream job my husband had just begun was over 9 months later. The didn't receive payment on several homes they had built and a 30 year-old company was bankrupt just like that. We were left with him trying to pick up the pieces, pay mounting bills and make the OLD historical home we had just moved into more livable.
When you end up on foodstamps, medicare and going to the foodpantry to feed your kids your mind isn't thinking a whole lot about how toned your arms are. When there are holes in the walls of your house, your annual paycheck is now a third of what you were getting and you have no idea when they will be patched up, it's hard to focus on losing 10 pounds, let alone 40! If anything the pounds increase because you can't relax on a vacation or even enjoy a daytrip to an amusement park, but you can enjoy a slice of cake. Well, we are finally living in a house now that is finished (we have moved and are renting,) that I can't do projects on even if I wanted to. My husband has a job where with a few hours of overtime we can pay all our bills- I am SO grateful to be paying my own utilities! I am grateful for the humility we had to laern the past few years- I've learned to accept help and that I can't do it all on my own. And I finally have a space in my brain where I can make my health a priority and take on the stress that is also a small part of this goal. My brain and heart were just too full of other worries to tackle my health too. My world feels more stable and safe than it has for years, so I am more able to add the changes that are part of getting fit.
Well, that was super long so I'm gonna call it, but if you're interested in seeing another person's weight-loss journey (and not at a beautiful ranch away from the real world) WATCH RUBY! :) BTW, just in case, I want to add that I am not a doctor and you should consult yours before beginning any diet or fitness regimen.
And most of all, if you are at a place in life right now where things are scary, unstable, and unsure, hang in there. It will get better. OK, have a healthy day! Love yourself and one good choice will lead to another! -Eva
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
Not So Sure About The Past Few Days, But That's OK :)
Tomorrow morning will be one week since my first weigh in. I would be excited, except the weekend happened. And the weekend included a date where we ate out. I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich with water and no fries only to find out after that they squirted cheese on it and grilled and buttered the toast it came in. Ugh. I tried to order healthy! The weekend also included a trip to Carl's Jr. since the kids had earned some money and wanted to spend it getting to eat there and play on the three story playground. I wanted to play in there too, but felt sick and had less of a work-out that day. :(
And then there were two get-togethers. One involved pizza, loaded with yummy toppings, and they ordered twice as much as we needed so there was plenty to go around. Guess who had to take the leftovers home? The other get-together involved ice cream. I'm sure I don't need to include the sweet details. I did pretty good watching my portion sizes but we visited long enough to warrant another serving, so that's where the trouble happened. Then if you're like me you start thinking, "we never by this stuff. I should enjoy it while I can. Everyone else is eating it." I've seriously got to self talk like I'm trying to avoid drinking in high school! "Not everyone else is doing it. And even if they are, you AREN'T everybody else." It's true. I'm not. I have a goal and I need to support myself more in reaching it.
Then this morning I totally pinched something in my back and could not walk! My husband had to come home from work early and I've been in bed. Part of me doesn't want to weigh myself at all tomorrow because I don't want to get discouraged. Also, I'm truly already feeling better and more confident in myself, so why should the scale matter? The other part of me knows it's about the accoutability so I should go ahead, hop on, and just see.
I'm proud of myself for not using diet soda, diet pills, diet bars, any of that stuff! I'm trying to eat fresh and eat more fruits and vegetables. I'm exercising at some level every day. I'm still a mom that has the occasional meal out or happy meal drive-thru, but I'm letting myself choose the healthier options even if they cost more (Carl's has a yummy turkey burger right now!) So, no matter the numbers, I like the Eva Barnett I am today more than the Eva I was last week, and that's something you can't measure on a scale.
And then there were two get-togethers. One involved pizza, loaded with yummy toppings, and they ordered twice as much as we needed so there was plenty to go around. Guess who had to take the leftovers home? The other get-together involved ice cream. I'm sure I don't need to include the sweet details. I did pretty good watching my portion sizes but we visited long enough to warrant another serving, so that's where the trouble happened. Then if you're like me you start thinking, "we never by this stuff. I should enjoy it while I can. Everyone else is eating it." I've seriously got to self talk like I'm trying to avoid drinking in high school! "Not everyone else is doing it. And even if they are, you AREN'T everybody else." It's true. I'm not. I have a goal and I need to support myself more in reaching it.
Then this morning I totally pinched something in my back and could not walk! My husband had to come home from work early and I've been in bed. Part of me doesn't want to weigh myself at all tomorrow because I don't want to get discouraged. Also, I'm truly already feeling better and more confident in myself, so why should the scale matter? The other part of me knows it's about the accoutability so I should go ahead, hop on, and just see.
I'm proud of myself for not using diet soda, diet pills, diet bars, any of that stuff! I'm trying to eat fresh and eat more fruits and vegetables. I'm exercising at some level every day. I'm still a mom that has the occasional meal out or happy meal drive-thru, but I'm letting myself choose the healthier options even if they cost more (Carl's has a yummy turkey burger right now!) So, no matter the numbers, I like the Eva Barnett I am today more than the Eva I was last week, and that's something you can't measure on a scale.
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Days 3 and 4: A Long Distance Countdown
So far, I feel like exercising and eating healthier has brought me closer to my kids. I really do feel more like playing with them when I'm done with my workouts, probably because Mommy has had some time to herself and is feeling more energized and happier about life. It feels good to be giving my kids healthier snacks since they are eating more of what I'm eating. They are my biggest motivators to finally be doing this, and keep me going. Here is some lunch I had in my daughter's bowl, to remind me of why I'm trying to watch my portion sizes... :)
It is still challengeing too though. I enjoy food. I was raised to enjoy and celebrate each day and celebrating often includes food. But I'm trying to take the long, real change route of finding healthier ways to celebrate, and learning to stop when I'm full. It might be easy to look at me and think, she's not THAT heavy. But trust me, that's the attitude that got me to this place (and in my tight workout clothes you can see it...ugh) It's kind of like that story about the boiling frogs. The story goes that if you put frogs in boiling water they will jump right out, but if you put them in water at room temperature and then turn up the heat, they will sit right in there until they boil alive. I don't know if anyone's ever done this, but the idea behind it is right on. So many of us have just sat in an increasing problem until it (poor health, obeseity...) is actually killing us and taking away from the quality of life we enjoy now.
In a way being gentle with myself and allowing myself to enjoy, indulge, forgive the extra weight, recognize that I'm still the same, good person inside, that looks aren't as important as personality...well, all of that has resulted in my being a tired, less-confident, less focused on my kids parent. If anything, I'm having to work-out now and miss out sometimes on things with them because little by little I let this get out of hand and now I have to do something big! I want to be able to manage it so I can be here for them now and in 50 years!
And I'm doing it with your help, my kids' help, and my husband's help, even when he is at work. I have a long distance to go with my health but I can get there, one day at a time, especially with long distance help, like this week...
I set a goal to do 100 down and ups (start standing, go down to a crouching position with hands on the floor, push your legs back so you go into plank, and then bring your legs back in and stand up again. I would do 15 or 10 at a time, take a couple minute break and then keep going. By the time I had 20 left I was SOOOOO tired! I mean, panting, sighing, needing to rest between 5. I texted my husband, I have a goal of 100 reps and have 20 left, pray for me! Just knowing someone else knew what I was trying to accomplish helped me keep going. I texted him again, 15. Then, 10. He responded , I know you can do it!!! And after seeing those words, I pushed hard to finish those last 10. I did them straight through, no more breaks. I had tears in my eyes, I could barely stand, I was breathing loud and heavily but I was happy and proud of myself. I did it!
I know that when I take the easy way out I am not as proud of myself. I am left wondering what could have been. I'm so glad I pushed myself, found the strength I needed in my husband and myself to get the job done and am looking forward to attacking and conquering that work out again! Although, my legs are still sore... :)
It is still challengeing too though. I enjoy food. I was raised to enjoy and celebrate each day and celebrating often includes food. But I'm trying to take the long, real change route of finding healthier ways to celebrate, and learning to stop when I'm full. It might be easy to look at me and think, she's not THAT heavy. But trust me, that's the attitude that got me to this place (and in my tight workout clothes you can see it...ugh) It's kind of like that story about the boiling frogs. The story goes that if you put frogs in boiling water they will jump right out, but if you put them in water at room temperature and then turn up the heat, they will sit right in there until they boil alive. I don't know if anyone's ever done this, but the idea behind it is right on. So many of us have just sat in an increasing problem until it (poor health, obeseity...) is actually killing us and taking away from the quality of life we enjoy now.
In a way being gentle with myself and allowing myself to enjoy, indulge, forgive the extra weight, recognize that I'm still the same, good person inside, that looks aren't as important as personality...well, all of that has resulted in my being a tired, less-confident, less focused on my kids parent. If anything, I'm having to work-out now and miss out sometimes on things with them because little by little I let this get out of hand and now I have to do something big! I want to be able to manage it so I can be here for them now and in 50 years!
And I'm doing it with your help, my kids' help, and my husband's help, even when he is at work. I have a long distance to go with my health but I can get there, one day at a time, especially with long distance help, like this week...
I set a goal to do 100 down and ups (start standing, go down to a crouching position with hands on the floor, push your legs back so you go into plank, and then bring your legs back in and stand up again. I would do 15 or 10 at a time, take a couple minute break and then keep going. By the time I had 20 left I was SOOOOO tired! I mean, panting, sighing, needing to rest between 5. I texted my husband, I have a goal of 100 reps and have 20 left, pray for me! Just knowing someone else knew what I was trying to accomplish helped me keep going. I texted him again, 15. Then, 10. He responded , I know you can do it!!! And after seeing those words, I pushed hard to finish those last 10. I did them straight through, no more breaks. I had tears in my eyes, I could barely stand, I was breathing loud and heavily but I was happy and proud of myself. I did it!
I know that when I take the easy way out I am not as proud of myself. I am left wondering what could have been. I'm so glad I pushed myself, found the strength I needed in my husband and myself to get the job done and am looking forward to attacking and conquering that work out again! Although, my legs are still sore... :)
Friday, March 9, 2012
Feeling As Beautiful As Heidi Klum
I just had to say one more thing today. I just read an interview with Heidi Klum about her recent split (I can't beleive I'm' typing this...I don't usually do the whole celebrity gossip thing...) The interview of course shows lots of modeling photos, but of all of them the most beautiful one of her was this picture. She was just happy, going down the slide with her daughter. I loved it, since this is the kind of photography I do, and because I'm a mom and know that feeling. It reminded me of the new photo I just put up as my facebook profile!
She then went on to say the following when asked when she feels the most beatiful:
To be honest, it's with my children. In my job, people tell you that all the time: 'This shoot was great. You look amazing.'But you never know what they say when you turn away.
But the kids don't edit anything. When they kiss you and tell you they love you and say, 'Mama, you're the best' -- that's really the only thing you care about.
Heidi, I totally agree.
She then went on to say the following when asked when she feels the most beatiful:
To be honest, it's with my children. In my job, people tell you that all the time: 'This shoot was great. You look amazing.'But you never know what they say when you turn away.
But the kids don't edit anything. When they kiss you and tell you they love you and say, 'Mama, you're the best' -- that's really the only thing you care about.
Heidi, I totally agree.
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